THE WHITE HOTEL GUIDE TO IMMORTALITY
Invitation to a Beheading (M3 7LW)
The toilet that is England just got shitter it seems in post-Brexit/post- Euro-games exit
Britain. Sophisticates, making statements of explanation, twisting complex
arguments into a sad circus of Eton-ego. We've hit the rotten bottom. I choose
to remain impassive, to view it all as a piece of bizarrely compelling theatre with an
ambitious running time. "What have I told you about reading the paper? " as I heard
an old wife tell her old husband on the bus the other day. Good question/sound
advice. The misery only multiplies once youv'e stopped looking at Kate Moss.
There doesn't seem to be much music left in England to dance to - or so they'd have
us believe. But down at THE WHITE HOTEL (M3 7LW), fuelled by all sorts of
substances the dancing takes on all sorts of shapes and would last forever if only the
guillotine of work wasn't looming in the near-distance. When I stare at people
dancing it's like art that haunts a room. In those single shining moments we are
The hope is: all the trouble I've known will be gone once I'm through the doors. And
so it is, for a long and exciting while as you go beyond the grim limits of self,
hammering the bottle from 12am – 8am, sometimes forgetting that you are
actually still awake. If only the inevitable wasn’t on the horizon. The big W. The
working week doesn't seem to deserve the effort of these people. Not in our addled-
eyes anyway. Don't let them go to waste staring into vague spaces and sun-struck
walls. There is another life and other deaths.
Here is the first instalment of THE WHITE HOTEL GUIDE TO
IMMORTALITY. What looks distinctly like a guide to a sinister cult is in fact a guide
to a sinister cult but in it's early virgin days. Hopefully, in time, somebody will truly
lose their mind and we'll be held happily responsible. Inside, it contains the written
debut of England's favourite pop and rock combo BEAT LES, alongside the
first edition of THE MOLE PEOPLE super-hero comic which has recently been
optioned by D-NILSEN films with Jesse Eisenberg, Woody Allen and Jennifer
Lawrence mooted to play the three leads. We’re certain it will be a huge success.
Read the first instalment of THE WHITE HOTEL GUIDE TO IMMORTALITY here.